May 10, 2008

Moms’ Role in Junior Tennis

Posted in Christian Tennis Devotional Videos, Coaching Articles, ICTA Tennis Ministry, Junior Tennis, Scott Paschal Tennis, Uncategorized tagged , , , , at 5:02 pm by Scott Paschal

ICTA Founder, Scott PaschalI’m not sure anyone has offered more influence on my life than my Mom.

Moms dream of their children when they themselves are children. How many of us have seen a little girl caring for her dolls? The love of motherhood starts early and lasts forever.

Who benefits from this? Me and you.

I’m currently in my 40s and at 6′ 3″ I weigh over 220 lbs. Yet, place me in a car with my mother driving and I know without a doubt that when she feels danger on the road and is forced to suddenly stomp on the brakes, her 65 year old arm will suddenly appear in front of me to keep me safe and sound!

Even though I’m wearing a seatbelt and the car has airbags, that arm will appear and there is nothing you and I can do to stop Mom from doing what she does best, which is to protect and care for us.

Now, it’s been a lot of years since Mom has driven me anywhere. But, you get the point.

Let’s look at a Mom’s role in the tennis development of her child.

Dealing with parents can be a “slippery slope” as Rick Macci, one of America’s top coaches, has often said.

Ask most honest high performance tennis coaches about what the worst part of their job is, and the vast majority will tell you that dealing with parents ranks at the top of the list.

I can vouch for that, as well. Unfortunately, I can also vouch that Christian parents are generally much worse than secular parents, or parents from other religions.

My personal list of horror story parents includes a married Christian Mom who lived through her daughter’s tennis, while at the same time was entangled in a lesbian love affair with her best friend. Daily, Mom and daughter would scream and cry on the phone. After a couple months of riding the roller coaster, I decided to no longer coach the player. Soon after, the Mom sent me hate emails claiming I am Satan.

Yet, though parents can be difficult, I can say I have great respect and admiration for the healthy, well balanced parents whose kids I’ve been blessed to coach.

Coaches worldwide attend seminars and workshops to learn how to best deal with the parents of their students. No one has really come up with a good answer. Basically, parents are people and people are flawed.

What I try to do is to educate the parent. Most parents want to learn, and they want their kids to have the parent’s best. In my experience, the vast majority of parents are ready and willing to learn.

As such, let’s take a look at what God’s Word, the Bible, says about parents… and since it’s Mother’s Day, let’s look at what God says about Mom, and particularly a mother’s heart!

The Importance of a Mother’s Heart

“Excuse me, sir. Do you remember me? I am the woman you saw standing here, praying to the Lord. I asked him for this child, and he gave me what I asked for. So I am dedicating him to the Lord. As long as he lives, he will belong to the Lord.’ Then they worshiped the Lord there.” 1 Samuel 1:27-28 (TEV)

1. A Mother’s Heart knows her children are a gift.

2. A Mother’s Heart understands the need for God’s help.

3. A Mother’s Heart wants what is best for her children.

* A Mother’s Heart on “Overdrive”

1. The danger of being over protective. (keeps children from becoming independent)

“It is like this: When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child does. But when I grew up, I put away childish things.” 1 Corinthians 13:11 (NLT)

2. The danger of being over indulgent. (keeps children from becoming mature)

“Discipline your children while You still have the chance; indulging them will destroy them.” Proverbs 19:18 (MSG)

3. The danger of being over involved. (children do not learn to look to and trust God for their needs-they look to Mom and Dad instead)

“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no man separate.” Mathew 19:5-6 (NIV)

* The Priority of a Mother’s Heart

1. A Mother’s Heart has unconditional love.

“So the Lord answers, ‘Can a woman forget her own baby and not love the child she bore?’ ” Isaiah 49:15 (TEV)

2. A Mother’s Heart demands proper respect.

“Respect your father and mother is the first commandment that has a promise added: ‘ so all may go well with you, and you may live a long time in the land.’ ” Ephesians 6:2-3 (NIV)

3. A Mother’s Heart teaches appropriate responsibility.

“Teach your children to choose the right path, and when they are older, they will remain upon it.” Proverbs 22:6.

4. A Mother’s Heart sets clear standards.

“Correction and discipline are good for children. If they have their own way they will make their mothers ashamed of them.” Proverbs 29:15 (TEV)

5. A Mother’s Heart protects from the world’s temptations.

“Do not give any of your children to be sacrificed to Molech, for you must not profane the name of your God. I am the Lord.” Leviticus 18:21

6. A Mother’s Heart reveals a heart for God

“(Timothy) I know that you sincerely trust the Lord, for you have the faith of your mother, Eunice, and your grandmother, Lois.” 2 Timothy 1:5 (NLT)

7. A Mother’s Heart rejoices as their children accept Jesus Christ.

“I have no greater joy than to hear my children are walking in truth.” 3 John 1:4 (NIV)

Moms are a blessing. Being a Mom is difficult, at best. A mother of a high performance junior tennis player really must make a defined effort to focus on Jesus to be the center of her world. When this happens, everyone benefits.

My hope is this article will reach Moms, and educate Moms on what God’s Word promises and teaches will help both them and their children.

In many ways this article can be read for Dads and for tennis coaches.

Seldom do we hear in sports, and particularly tennis, about how God’s Word can direct and teach us to become better coaches, parents, and athletes.

May God use this article to reach as many as possible, to open eyes and warm hearts, to instill a willingness to see Him in all things, and to bring a humbleness and a kindness to our lives.

Thanks Moms for your hearts for us. You are a blessing.

“Her children respect her and bless her; her husband joins in with words of praise.” Proverbs 31:28 (MSG)

God bless!

Coach Scotty

International Christian Tennis Association

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1 Comment »

  1. olumide said,

    Hello
    my name is olumide eitan i am from west africa i love to play tennis and i have hear that this christian tennis is coming to nigeria and i want to ask that which state………… bye………
    from abidemi olumide enitan ….


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